Hello, Everyone:

I hope that all of you had a very pleasant week.  Hopefully, your weekend will be even better!

Yesterday, I read an article on the Internet about a married woman who is publishing the details of her “sexually open” marriage.  Being a mature, open minded woman who was a bit curious, I read the article.  When I finished it, my attitude concerning monogamy was changed.

Years ago, I accepted the reality that men and women are not “naturally monogamous”.  For various reasons, it is not unusual for people to have sexual liaisons outside of their marriages.  From what I have observed, the reasons usually revolve around marital discord, financial stability, upward mobility or just plain boredom that motivates people to cheat on their spouses.  Being a Christian, I know that committing adultery violates the Commandments, but it happens and as far as I’m concerned, I’ll let GOD do the judging.

When I finished reading this woman’s article, I was “angry to the bone”.  This person had the unmitigated gall to say that the concept of a traditional monogamous marital relationship is nothing more than a “fairy tale” that does not work.  What angered me so much was this woman accepted “absolutely no responsibility” for her own personal shortcomings.  She married a nice guy and about three years within the marriage she started having affairs with women.  This delusional individual would have the public believe that she was not aware of her rather strong attraction to women before she got married!  The devil above all else is “a liar” and who does she think she’s fooling!  Give me a break! 

In order to continue to openly indulge her lesbian sexuality, she talked her husband into doing a ménage a trios or “threesome” with another women and herself. He liked it so much that he eventually gave into her suggestion that they should have an “open marriage”.  Of course, she is perfectly fine with him going into bars and clubs and “hooking up” with total strangers and GOD knows what diseases they may have as long as she can have sex with women.  As far as I’m concerned, this woman has the mentality of a “crack dealer”.  A drug dealer hooks a person; then their morality completely disappears because they become “enslaved to an addiction”. 

Don’t misunderstand me, I don’t hate or harshly judge homosexuals, because none of us are perfect but don’t blame the institution of traditional marriage for “your refusal to openly acknowledge your true sexual orientation”.  Anytime you’re not at all concerned about what your spouse does with other women – you don’t love him!  This woman simply wants the security and convenience of a traditional marriage while she “hides in the closet doing women”!  She’s nothing more than a “hypocrite”and should not trash “Holy Matrimony”.  I consider myself somewhat open minded and she’s greatly offended my sensibilities.

I’ve never been married and both of my parents were married more than once but I don’t blame the institution of marriage, itself, for our almost 50 percent divorce rate.  A marriage is built or broken solely upon the choices two people make.  This institution is not perfect because people are imperfect; however, a traditional monogamous marriage is still a worthwhile societal structure to nurture. 

Marriage is tough because it forces people to give up their romantic fantasies and sacrifice their illusions for something greater than their own egos.  It’s not easy to change.  It’s not easy to admit when you’re wrong.  It’s not easy to say,“I’m sorry and really mean it” nor is it easy “to forgive” when the one you care about the most has “mortally wounded you”.  However, if two people have the strength to look each other in the eye and I say, “I’m willing to keep trying because I love you just that much”, then it’s certainly DOABLE!!!

May Peace Be With All of You,

Sistah Selah